Crazy Versus Breast Milk

I’m at a crossroads. Take my anti-depressant/ anti-anxiety medication or make enough breast milk to satisfy my baby. Both can’t be accomplished. It’s one or the other.

I’ve tried maybe five or six breast milk supplements. Fennel with thistle and nettle pills, marshmallow root tea, ginger, shatavari root extract, fennel seed drink mix, and so on. I’ve spent a lot of dough trying to find the right supplement.

The fact of the matter is Wellbutrin ups dopamine levels, and dopamine lowers prolactin levels. You need prolactin to make milk. =

SSRIs, which effect serotonin, have never helped. My issue has always been a dopamine issue.

It’s tough. She smiles when I give her the mere ONE OUNCE I can pump out PER DAY. She loves booby milk. And it seems to lessen her nasal congestion and it could help her eczema. There’s also a bunch of nutrients in breast milk that aren’t found in formula—even the expensive fancy formula I have.

But how crazy can I let myself be? How depressed can I stand? How awful can I be around my significant other?

Yet, I’m down about not being able to give her breast milk. I want to be able to do that for her. I feel like Why should she have to suffer just because I’ve got a chemical imbalance?

But stopping Wellbutrin could also make my Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome worse too.

It’s so unfair. I know, I know. Life’s not fair. But seriously, this is terribly unfair.